Harry Potter Versus Lord of the Rings
by Nilfalasiel
Summary: Alright this is kinda like a game show thing between a character from each book. I didn't know where to post it so it's here. Please R&R! I would LOVE suggestions!


Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter and I most certainley don't own Lord of the Rings in any way shape or form. If this doesn't cover it then feel free to sue my cousin Shirley.  
  
A/N: Please don't hate me if I make fun of one of your favorite characters *dodges rotten tomatoes* I really do like both Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter so I just thought this would be rather amusing. Oh and I don't have anyone read my stories before I post so please don't get upset over lack of grammer. x_X  
  
Round 1: Hermione Granger vs. Arwen Evenstar  
  
Announcer: From the book Harry Potter it's Hermione Granger. And from the epic tales of Lord of the Rings we have Arwen Evenstar. Now I want a clean fight from you both. Ms. Granger no magic so stop muttering everything you've ever learned under your breath and Ms. -  
  
Arwen: That's soon to be Mrs. thank you very much!  
  
Announcer: Alright Mrs. Evenstar there will be know nancying elf tricks allowed. Ok now lets begin. You each will be asked a question about the other's story. If you get it right then you win a point. The first one to 5 points is the winner.  
  
Hermione: Yes! *hovers over buzzer*  
  
Arwen: hmm? Oh yes right!  
  
Announcer: The first category is words and phrases. Pick a number between one and three Ms. Granger.  
  
Hermione: *buzz's in* Three!!  
  
Announcer: Here's the question. What does the inscription on the ring of power say in the common tongue?  
  
Hermione: *jumps on buzzer* What is.one ring to rule them all one ring to find them one ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them!  
  
Announcer: Very good! One point to you. Now Arwen it's your turn to pick a question.  
  
Arwen: *to herself* lets see we'll need invitations, a cake, and someone to do the music for us.. *looks off dreamily but sees everyone staring at her* What? Oh I'm sorry! Two I suppose because two is always better then one.  
  
Announcer: Alright. What is the simple spell that can open a door?  
  
Arwen: What kind of easy question is that? I mean come on I am an elf for pete's sake and Gandalf uses it to open the gates of Moria. It's Mellon  
  
Announcer: *shakes head* Yes you are and elf and therefore should know that Mellon is the elvish word for friend. The answer we were looking for was alohomora.  
  
Arwen: What are you talking about!!! Don't you know that my future husband is going to be the king of all of you! You could be arrested and thrown to the orcs!  
  
Announcer: Calm down! You'll mess up your hair. So the score is Hermione 1 and Arwen 0. The next category is dramatic deaths. Arwen it is your turn to go first.  
  
Arwen: Hmpff! Well lets go with two again I suppose.  
  
Announcer: Who was killed by a giant snake in one of the girl's bathrooms at Hogwarts?  
  
Arwen: Well it couldn't have been that important because I have no idea.  
  
Moaning Myrtle: See no one cares about me! Saying I'm not important well fine! Why don't you just throw a book at me? *zooms away crying*  
  
Announcer: Well...that was her right there and I must say that I believe you offended her. Hermione pick a number please.  
  
Hermione: *buzzes in* What is 1?  
  
Announcer: Listen you don't have to buzz in you know. But here's your question, Who died eventually after being shot with four arrows by a rather repulsive Uruk-hai named Lars?  
  
Hermione: *slaps buzzer* ThatwouldhavetobeBoromirwhodiedtryingtodefendthetwohobbitsmerryandpippinfrom theurukhaiwhowereattackingthem.  
  
Announcer: Wow do you think that you might be able to slow down a little about all I heard was 'trying to marry the uruk-hai'.  
  
Hermione: No! I said it was Boromirwhowastheherotryingtosavemerryandpippinfromcertaindeathbecausehefeltb adfortryingtotaketheringfromfrodo.  
  
Announcer: Ok I swear you're not speaking English. *whispers to producer* All I heard was 'the hero and pippin felt Frodo'.  
  
Producer: Whatareyoutalkingabout?Whatifyoujustgotoacommercial?  
  
Announcer: AHH! Now you're doing it to. Well in that case you don't get the point Ms. Granger. Moving on to the next category called name that villain! Alright Hermione what is the name of the maker of the one ring that rules all the others?  
  
Hermione: *Mauls buzzer ferociously as she tries to press it faster then..well herself* Saruman!  
  
Announcer: No I'm sorry the answer is Saruon. Now Arwen if you answer this question correctly you could tie the game. Who is the wizard that everyone fears will one day return to power and is constantly referred to as you- know-who?  
  
Arwen: *uses special elvin powers to read Hermione's mind* Voldemort!  
  
Announcer (who is now going to be referred to as Fred): That is correct!  
  
***BEEEEEP!!!!!!!! We interrupt this program to bring you a severe weather advisory in the following counties. In the left side of middle earth there will be severe thunderstorms and in Britain there appears to be a potential hurricane building up. These conditions are the right ones needed to start tornadoes so be on the lookout. This advisory goes until 9 o'clock tonight. We know return to your regular scheduled program. BEEEEEEPP!!!***  
  
Fred: Well for a quick recap on the scores Hermione has 2 and Arwen has 4. So this could be the last round. The category is famous old wizards. Hermione you get to go first. Name the wizard who dresses all in brown and helps Gandalf?  
  
Hermione: That would be Radgast the Brown.  
  
Fred: Very good! Now Arwen this is for the game. Who is the wizard that betrayed the Potter's trust and was responsible for the Potters death?  
  
Arwen: That would have to be Peter Pettigrew! My wittle Aragorn told me, yes he did *pats Aragorn's head*  
  
Aragorn: *flirting furiously with Eowyn* Do you mind Arwen!  
  
Fred: That is correct. So we have a winner! Congratulations Arwen you win a toaster oven. Yes it's made by Black & Decker and can hold up to sixteen pieces of toast.  
  
Hermione: I..I can't believe some is smarter than me.I lost to a nancying elf no less. *runs to the library crying*  
  
Arwen: *hits Aragorn* come on my little sweetie kins. You need a haircut. Whew, and a bath!  
  
Fred: Wait don't you want your toaster oven?! Hello! Is anybody there?  
  
*custodian flicks off lights*  
  
Fred: Hello? Are you sure there's no one there? I have this toaster oven for you Arwen! Do you want it or not? *looks around* Well if your sure... *runs off with the toaster oven*  
  
A/N: So?? What do you think? Be honest now. I want to know if I should continue. My next one will probably be Gollum vs. Dobby. Any requests will be taken into consideration I need all the help I can get. 


End file.
